Quit Your Life
by xfirefly9x
Summary: Mal/Inara. Inara has a secret. What isn't she telling Mal?
1. A Companion In Distress

**A/N:** Thanks to browncoat2x2 for the beta!

Quit Your Life

Companioning was the only sure thing that Inara had ever done. It made her who she was and she didn't know who she would be without it. When it came to Mal, though, her immense training meant nothing. He ripped everything that she knew away, leaving her unsure about her entire existence. He had a part of her, not that he'd ever know it – he was too stubborn to ever notice – and it was because of him that the shields that Inara had constructed around herself were beginning to fall away…

Inara stared into her intricately painted china cup at the soggy, russet-coloured tealeaves that remained. She had hoped that the drink would calm her nerves and help clear her mind, but she was as foggy about things as she had been before, if not more.

Inara didn't know what to do. It wasn't the first time, but at least in the past, she'd had the support of the Guild, her family and her friends to help with her decisions. At the present time, she was losing control and feeling things she shouldn't be feeling and if that wasn't enough, there was no one who could assist her with her problems.

Heavy footsteps alerted Inara to the presence of another being and her line of thought was broken off and put to the side for a later date. Sighing, she tiredly watched the shuttle's entrance, waiting for the inevitable invasion that was no doubt about to ensue.

Within moments, her prediction came to life in the form of a dishevelled yet somewhat pleased-looking Captain.

"Inara?" Mal peered around the shuttle door at her, a bemused expression crossing his face at her irritated glare. "Can I come in?" He entered without waiting for her response and walked over to the couch.

"Mal! Don't sit down!" Inara grimaced as he sat, spreading the dirt and muck from his clothes onto her formerly unsoiled couch. Flecks of dirt and who knows what else etched its way into the cloth and random pieces of the same material fell, drifting slowly in circles before finally reaching the ground.

Mal jumped up as if he'd just sat down on burning coals and glanced at Inara his eyes full of sincere regret. Had Inara been in a better mood than her current one, she'd have found his behaviour rather amusing.

"Thanks a lot." Inara glowered at him – if looks could kill, Mal wouldn't have had a chance. "Do you know how hard it is to get stains out of that couch?" She moved over to the couch to examine the damage. "No, I don't suppose you do," she added, resignedly letting out another sigh and crumpling beat, onto the edge of her bed.

"Hey, are you okay?" Mal asked, clearly concerned. He traipsed over to stand by the bed, carelessly leaving a trail of debris behind him.

"Yes, I'm fine. Everything is shiny," Inara stated stonily, refusing eye contact and focusing instead on her freshly painted fingernails – they were a deep red colour and not a chip flawed them. Somehow, the lack of imperfections didn't comfort Inara as much as she had expected them to when she had originally applied the polish earlier that morning.

Mal saw through her words easily and moved to sit down next to her, intending on comforting her, and then interrogating her until she'd give in and tell him what was wrong. Remembering his filthy, dust-ridden appearance, he staggered at the last second to stop himself and fell clumsily to the ground despite his best efforts.

"Mal?" Inara momentarily forgot about her problems and burst out laughing. "Are you okay?" She grinned helplessly at him, unable to wipe the amused expression from her face.

Beside her, Mal haughtily pulled himself to his feet and brushed down his shirt with the palms of his hands.

"I meant to do that," he told Inara, who instead of being convinced by his far from likely story, collapsed into hysterics. It was at least a minute later that she was able to regain control and answer him.

"Sure you did, Mal. You _always_ have very well planned-out schemes." Rolling her eyes, Inara lay back on the bed and attempted to catch her breath.

"I do! I do have very planned-out schemes!" Mal protested, resulting in another burst of laughter from the Companion. "Hey!"

"Mal. Do you not recall our second run-in with that jien hwo vixen you married – or the first run-in, for that matter?"

"Saffron or whatever her name really is, you mean?" Mal scratched his nose, reminiscing on the experiences that he'd had with the girl. Interestingly enough, both times that they encountered her one of them had ended up with a slight case of nudity and a near-death experience. The girl attracted trouble.

Inara rolled her eyes. "How many other vixens are there that you've married?" she said pointedly.

"Right…I knew that…" Mal chewed his bottom lip thoughtfully. "Yeah, I do recall." He finally answered, nodding his head slowly.

"So, you remember how badly it went? And do you remember how little all that planning that went into ensuring that Saffron didn't try anything, like stab you in the back again for example, was worth?"

"Fine! Maybe my plans don't all go to…plan. But I do have plans!" Mal argued weakly. He brushed his hand through his hair, knowing that Inara had the upper hand and would win the argument in the end. "Anyway, what's all this got to do with anything?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Nothing, really." Inara smiled. She took Mal's change of subject as an indication that she'd beaten him. She _was_ right about him and his lack of ability when it came to plan making, after all.

"I seem to recall you being somewhat moody before," Mal hinted at, continuing on. He studied Inara carefully and awaited her response, sensing that she would tell him what had been bothering her if he behaved.

"You do?" The Companion took over and gave Mal a blank stare that seemed to suggest that he had assumed wrongly. He stared back, determined to get a decent answer out of her.

"Yes, I do recall. Care to enlighten me?"

"I…I'm just really tired." Inara lied.

Chinese Translations

Jien hwo - cheap floozy

**A/N:** I'll try to update this within the next few days, so there shouldn't be too long to wait. Let me know what you think please!


	2. Pushing For The Truth

**A/N: Here's the final chapter! Decided to keep this short instead of continuing it. Anyways, thanks to browncoat2x2 for the beta! And let me know what you think please!**

"You're just really tired?" Mal inquired, finding it hard to believe a word of Inara's excuse. He absentmindedly brushed his hand through his tangled brown hair, releasing more dirt and fragments of unidentifiable organic matter onto the floor.

"Yes, I haven't been sleeping well lately," Inara faked a yawn, strategically turning her head away to avoid eye contact. After a few seconds, she glanced over at the Captain, realizing that avoiding him would make him more curious.

"So, why is it that you're missing all your beauty sleep then? Something going on?" Mal asked.

"No!" Inara replied too quickly. "There's no reason," she added hastily at Mal's questioning stare. She walked over to the wooden dresser by her bed and pulled open the top drawer, fumbling around in it for something.

After a moment, she withdrew a brush and returned to the couch. "So, you never got around to telling me what you came here for," Inara finally said, pointedly. "Was there something you wanted?"

"Ah…no, not really," Mal replied. He continued staring at her, curiosity lighting his eyes.

Inara sighed at his penetrating expression and was about to tell Mal what was on her mind when River poked her head in the door. "Not one of them anymore. Different," she explained to Mal, cocking her head to the side thoughtfully.

Mal stared at her, dumbfounded, then turned his attention back to Inara. "She wouldn't happen to be talkin' 'bout you, would she?" Glancing back towards the door, he saw a flash of red as River turned and raced off.

"I…don't know what you mean," Inara replied, taken aback slightly. Placing the brush to the side, she busied herself with pouring herself more tea, her hands shaking and betraying her as she did so. When she let her eyes flicker back up to Mal, she was almost a hundred percent sure that he had picked up on her lie and sighed again.

"Yes, you do," Mal pushed. "Come on, 'fess up!"

"I don't know what you want me to say, Captain," Inara answered, her voice only wobbling very slightly.

"Jus' tell me the truth. What's going on?"

"There's nothing going on," Inara defended, reinforcing the guards that she had so carefully constructed around herself.

Mal shook his head. "Why is it that I don't believe you?"

"Tyen shiao duh! Why can't you just let it go?" Inara burst out. She immediately regretted her words – while they quietened the captain considerably, they also made him more curious.

"So, there is something then," Mal finally said, with a mischievous grin.

"There's nothing going on that you need to know about."

"Huh," Mal said thoughtfully. "It's something to do with whoring, isn't it?"

"Oh, great. I should've known you'd start on that," Inara fumed. She stood up and angrily walked over to dresser to return her unused brush. It had merely been a distraction before, something to keep her hands busy.

Mal's smile faded and turned into a scowl. It deepened at Inara's next words. "I'm leaving."

"You're – " Mal started, hurt. He let his words fade off, unable to finish the sentence and turned his gaze to the floor. "Again? You're leaving Serenity again?"

Inara stared at him incredulously. "No, Mal. Not Serenity. I'm quitting the Guild. Since Miranda…I just can't. I can't do it anymore." The anger visibly left her body and she let out a deep breath that she hadn't realised she'd been holding.

"Wha–?" Mal gaped at her.

Inara couldn't look Mal in the eye, so instead focused on the shuttle door. Then, she repeated herself. "I'm leaving the Guild, Mal. I quit my life as a Companion. I'm no longer one of them."

She slowly turned back to him and nervously awaited his response.

"Huh," he continued staring at her, a look of pure disbelief evident on his face. "Why didn't you just say so?"

"I didn't know how you'd react. And saying out loud makes it all real."

"Oh." Mal's lip curved up into a crooked smile. "Will you be staying on Serenity?"

"Yes, if that's okay with you. I won't be able to pay rent any longer, but I'm sure there's some other arrangement we can make?"

Mal scrunched up his nose and it took Inara several moments to comprehend what she had just said.

"Not like that! I meant –"

"Yeah, I know," Mal nodded and smiled weakly at her. "Conjure we'll find you something."

Inara beamed at him gratefully, a sincere smile finding its way onto her face. "Thank you."

"'s nothing, Inara. You're always welcome here, no matter what."

"I'll remember that."

For several moments, they sat in silence. Both their thoughts focused on one thing: where would they go now and what would happen next? With Inara beginning a new life, anything was possible. A whole lot of doors had opened for them, revealing shiny new opportunities to take advantage of. The question was, would they?

Mal finally surrendered and brought the question to life. "So…what now?"

Inara just smiled. "I guess we'll find out soon."

END

Chinese Translations

Tyen shiao duh - in the name of all that's sacred


End file.
